Done with Mondays
by Nothorse
Summary: "So, what will it be?", she asked once he was close enough, "Tearful reunion complete with hugs, a formal arrest or a quick green light? There's only five other muggles here, should be easy enough to obliviate them."


_Due to popular request — and my own curiosity — this is continued. Let's see if Hermione can explain._

* * *

It took Harry a while to rearrange his mental image of Hermione and make it match the girl behind the bar. The bushy hair of memory was simply gone, replaced by a slightly grown-out buzz cut. The face was more angular, harsher somehow, yet she had an unforced friendly smile as she was talking to one of the patrons.

The moment she saw him, her face lost all expression. She moved to an unoccupied part of the bar, waiting for him to approach.

"So, what will it be?", she asked once he was close enough, "Tearful reunion complete with hugs, a formal arrest or a quick green light? There's only five other muggles here, should be easy enough to obliviate them." Harry was shocked by the utter lack of emotion in her voice.

"Talk", he said. "Just. Can we talk it out? I —"

"Come by at five", she said. "that's when my shift ends. I have a student I coach in english at seven, so we can grab a bite and have an hour and a half. I'll reserve a table. Now please leave. I need to be cheerful for the tips and I can't do that with you around."

When Harry came back in at five, Hermione just nodded at a small corner table. A few minutes after he had sat down, Hermione joined him, carrying a tray with two dishes and two glasses.

"The Shepherd's Pie is good", she said. "and I brought Cokes for both of us. I hope you don't mind." She deposited the food and brought back the tray before joining him at the table.

For a minute both of them watched each other, warily, trying to figure out the changes. Then Hermione took up her spoon and nodded towards Harry's plate.

"Eat. It doesn't get any warmer." She said and started on her own plate.

Harry hesitated for a moment, then started eating. Both were silent during the meal, concentrating on their food and gving the other no nore than a glance or two. After they both were done, Hermione leaned back in her chair and looked at Harry. "You said you wanted to talk", she said. "So talk."

"I think", Harry said, "most of it —"

"Most?", interrupted Hermione.

"Most, not all, yes." said Harry. "Most of it comes down to 'Why?'" He paused.

"Why did I leave? Why did I kill Dumbledore? I did manage that, did I?"

Harry nodded.

"Good." said Hermione, with an amount of bitterness that surprised Harry.

They stayed silent for a long moment, until Hermione took a deep breath.

"I suppose it can't hurt." she said. "You've already found me and whatever you have planned, I have no way to avoid. Where do you want me to start?"

Harry just looked at er. "The beginning?" he said.

"That's going to take a while. No. I'll just give you the Reader's Digest version." she said. At Harry's frown, she continued, "The shortened version for busy people."

"There once was a little girl — oh, fuck it, wrong start. Let me try again."

Harry frowned at the uncharacteristic obscenity but simply motioned her to continue.

"I've always been a freak." Hermione missed the scowl on Harry's face at that word. "I'm cursed with a very good memory. Not only do I remember almost everything I've ever read, I usually know exactly in which book, where that book is on the shelves and on which page and line I've read it. I'm slightly less perfect with what I hear, but good enough. In third grade I found a book on speed-reading in the town library. After that even long novels rarely took me more than a day.

"Which means", she looked up at Harry. "I had my textbooks memorized after the first week at school and was bored the rest of the year. That lead to daydreaming. Which lead to my parents telling me off for not paying attention in school. That lead to - anyway, I was happy enough with my books.

"I never did any accidental magic. At least I think so." She frowned. "Maybe my parents growing distant was accidental magic. I just wanted to be left alone. And I was. And then the Hogwarts letter came. Finally an explanation. I was so happy. I would be in a school where everybody was like me.

"That happy delusion was dispelled after a week at Hogwarts. But after Halloween that year I at least had friends. Two boys who seemed to like me. And while I didn't forget that I was different, all was well for a while. Even with my parents. Absence did seem to make the heart grow fonder.

"So then we have 3 decent years. Except for being petrified, once literally and far more often metaphorically, all worked out. I had gotten used to being seen as a mental monster, but I had my friends.

"Then it all went downhill. I was ready to leave after the second task. I actually had the whole spell sequence researched and mapped out by then. Although the target would have been Fudge at that time.

"But you still needed me. I still had at least one friend. I could still be wanted. I wanted to be wanted, needed. That was what kept me going through Umbridge and Ron suddenly falling for the blonde idiot and even the one friend growing distant.

Hermione drank. "And then. And then you didn't need me anymore, even worse, you didn't want me anymore, and all the help I thought I had given was suspect. When you turned away from me in the hallway during those terrible four days, when you didn't even see me, I gave up.

"Magic had given me nothing, or worse, it had given me something and taken it all away again. Suicide was an option. Don't think I didn't consider it. But suicide would have been weak and I didn't want to be weak ever again. So remembered my notes from fourth year. And I decided to not like mondays anymore.

Hermione smiled at Harry's confused face. "Boomtown Rats", she said. "Look it up."


End file.
